[for Anya]

[every_blossom_blooming]

Nina stared at the dress in the window with a little bit of longing. Something about being able to afford it made window shopping less fun, but she did it anyway, doing her best that she didn't have such a huge haul just sitting in her bank account. Even after helping Geralt with building his house in the woods, she still had more than enough.

If she were in Ketterdam, that money would have gotten her back to Ravka. She would have given it to the Second Army, or the king, or something. She didn't need it for herself. She didn't even really want it. She hadn't done the job for the money, she'd done it to help Matthias.

But Matthias was not in danger here, and there was no way to go home. Not even with five million kruge.

So she would window shop, and she would do her best to live a life in Darrow that didn't leave her bored to tears.

"I wonder if it comes in red," she said out loud. "Even if I have almost nowhere to wear it."

Comments

[homelovefamily]

Anya rarely shops here, besides for necessities like groceries. She knows the name of her local butcher and a practical bakery and is friendly with the green grocer. There are few times when she indulges her curiosity about the fashion here, trying on various things, but she almost never buys anything. Too many of her years were spent with very little, either as a child in austerity and hand-me-downs in the palaces, or after when she just had the clothes on her back.

Walking down the street, she takes in the various window displays pausing outside a window next to a lovely tall woman just in time to catch what she says. Her accent is familiar enough that it instantly makes her heart ache.

"It would be beautiful in red," she agrees assessing the dress and then the woman. "I think red would suit you as well."

[every_blossom_blooming]

"Red is my color," Nina said happily as she looked over at the woman. "I don't know if it's always been that way or just one that I came to embrace over time, but now it's half my wardrobe."

The other woman's accent makes her ache, because she sounded like she could be from Os Alta or Balakirev.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to stare. Your accent is so familiar, you could be from home."

[homelovefamily]

"Is it?" Anya has never worn something truly red, bright and vivid like the color of blood. Dark red shading towards burgundy or paler shades like rose, she has worn, but not that red. That red is too similar to the color of the Bolsheviks, too similar to the horrors that haunt her dreams. Wearing it might make her look like a ghost.

But she can appreciate it on others. Smiling curiously at the woman, she considers having a single color to call one's own. "I think my wardrobe is more brown and blue on accident rather than preference or a flattering nature," Anya confesses. With a regal dismissive wave of her hand, she shakes her head. "No, do not worry your own accent sounds familiar to me as well. As if you are from Russia, but not quite."

[every_blossom_blooming]

Nina gave the girl next to her a discerning look, then flashed another effusive smile. "You'd look beautiful in blues and greens, they'd light up your eyes."

Another Russian; Nina wondered if this girl knew Gleb. "I'm from a place called Ravka, which I'm learning is rather similar to your Russia, at least as far as language and some culture goes."

That was where most of the similarities ended, other than perhaps the civil war. "Do you want to come in with me? Even if we don't buy, we can still look."

[homelovefamily]

Blue makes Anya think of the blue dress that she wore the ballet, the dark sapphire color that shimmered in the light. It had been the first time that she had felt like a princess, that the memories of the night before and that parade with Dmitry hadn't just been the work of midnight hours. It hadn't been a game anymore. That dress had been the start of getting her life back.

Such a thought makes her think of Gleb, of Dmitry, of the mess that such a big part of her life has once again become. A frown tugs at her mouth and she shakes her head slightly to banish it, twisting it into a smile. "I will keep that in mind. I suppose that I don't have to wear only boring practical clothes here," she says with a faint laugh. "But yes. I will come inside with you."

Ravka has a familiar sound, the way the woman pronounces the name of her homeland rolling pleasantly through Anya's mind. "Oh? So you have met some of my fellow Russians? Who?" Curiosity has gotten the best of her and she can't exactly walk that question back without inviting more question. "Similar culture and language is better than nothing."

[every_blossom_blooming]

"A man called Gleb," she said as she held the door open. "And yes, it is better than nothing. I've been away from home for such a long time, and I miss it desperately."

But now she was trapped here in Darrow, with little else but a few friends, time, and money. So she would try to make the best of it. As they went into the shop, Nina put her hair up, like she meant business. "I'm Nina, by the way."

[homelovefamily]

"Gleb," Anya repeats her voice sounding stilted and foreign to her own ears as she hesitates for a moment to look at this woman before going inside the store. Slowing hard, she forces herself to continue. To ignore the heart-breaking lurch at the sound of his name from someone else. "I know him. And yes, I understand. I had only recently left Russia when I arrived here and I still miss it greatly."

It had been search of another home, for the family that she now can name. Paris had given her a gift and left her with pain as well. It feels like a lifetime ago, when she was straddling two very different lives. Nodding in understanding, she smiles faintly at the change of the woman's hair. "It is pretty up," she gestures to the style, ignoring her wayward reddish blonde waves. "Nice to meet you. I'm Anya."

The hesitation before she says her name is growing smaller every day. It is still there, but it is starting to feel like hers at last.

[every_blossom_blooming]

"You're Anya?" Nina lifted her eyebrows. My, she had managed to step in it, hadn't she? Nina smiled and fixed her hair in place. "A pleasure to finally meet you. I haven't heard much, but I have heard a little. Gleb and I met not long ago over a sweet little dog, and we've run into each other a few times since."

She'd run into Wanda and Pietro too, and Kavinsky, and she wondered if they all sort of circled each other, knowing or unknowing, looking for something familiar. Something like home. She hadn't been back to Ravka in so long, but she missed it like a limb, and it was nice to hear familiar accents and languages.

"I miss Ravka desperately. Most of all, I miss the downright pleasant summers, compared to Darrow." She made a face. She did not like the humidity one bit.

[homelovefamily]

"Yes...?" In an instantly Anya feels caught out and uncertain, like being plied with memories that only half add up in her mind or dancing when she only knows part of the steps and a little of the music. The moment comes and goes as Nina explains the familiarity. A sad little bubble bursts in her chest at the mention of Gleb, heart aching faintly.

"Oh, Gleb. Yes I know him very well." She wonders if she should say knew him well as all of that has seem to gone to pieces. The mention of the dog brightens her mood. "Ah yes, the little dog is mainly mine these days. His name is Pushkin, but I call him Sasha."

Nodding she smiles a bit brighter. "Oh yes. Down by Odessa it would get quite warm, but that was near a southern sea. Russia can have cool summers in places and warm winters in others, if you are willing to follow the seasons."

[every_blossom_blooming]

"I keep thinking I might want a dog, or a cat or something... I've no idea how a cat would feel about Geralt," she said as she spied the dress they'd been looking at in the window. She tugged Anya along with her as she described Odessa.

"I was so happy when we got snow here in the winter. In Ketterdam the snow got dirty so fast, I almost wished it wouldn't happen at all." It was beautiful in the moment, but as soon as human activity resumed, it was grey and dreary.

[homelovefamily]

"Perhaps a dog or cat will just take up residence with you and you won't have to worry," she offers thinking of how Pushkin just settled into her life without much say. Once she had met him, she knew that she couldn't truly part with him.

Letting herself be tugged along by Nina as she talks, Anya sighs at the loveliness of the dress. Without the layer of glass and sunlight it is somehow even prettier. "Oh it is lovely," she remarks with a smile. "You should try it on, no matter the price."

[every_blossom_blooming]

"Is it terrible to say I might get it if I like it enough? I really need to do something more worth while with this money," she sighed as she looked at the dress. Nina peered over at Anya.

"Will you try one on, too? Even if we decide not to."

Anya had a rather different body type than Nina did, and she was curious to see what it would look like on someone else.

[homelovefamily]

Years of lacking in nice things and the ability to have them makes Anya hesitate a moment before she answers. "No, I don't think that is terrible."

There are certainly more worthwhile things to spend such money on, but she understands the appeal of having something nice. Her fingers reach out to casually touch the fabric of one of the dresses on the rack. She nods before smiling.

"Yes. I will try one on. The same one in a different color or something else entirely?"